Deep thoughts on eloping
We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love. — Dr. Seuss
One year ago today, Adam and I eloped. 6 months before that, we had been in the mist of planning a wedding that was getting out of control. So we toned it down and tried to plan something much more low key. That was becoming impossible as well, so finally we threw up our hands and decided to elope. We wanted to just go down to city hall, but in Texas you can’t do that. We would have had to make an appointment with a judge and have it in a room in the building which seemed pretty lame, so we decided to go to dinner instead.
Nothing fancy, we simply went to the restaurant where we first met and our friends Erin who was ordained, her husband Dave and Steve who is a photog joined us. The idea for photos came to us that morning as we were shopping downtown for our wedding outfits, Adam at By George and me at Anthropologie (big shocker there). Thankfully, Steve was able to join us to provide the only traditional aspect of the wedding and he took photos of us before dinner on the exact spot we met. Between the entree and dessert I read the above quote off of a pink post it note and we were pronounced married. Our waiter realized that we had wedding bombed the restaurant at this point and a very pretty pieces of cake with Congratulations on it in chocolate was sent out for dessert. And that was that.
Full disclosure, I had a very large, dream wedding 10 years before this and after having it both ways will hands down recommend eloping to anyone and everyone who will listen. These are my deep thoughts on why…
1. When you each have two sets of parents and more siblings between you than you can count on one hand, there is no such thing as a simple wedding.
2. A huge and expensive party has nothing to do with a marriage.*
3. When you’re in your mid or late 20’s there seems to much more time in one’s schedule to meet with wedding planners and get all wedding-y. In your mid 30’s it starts to just add to the huge pile of work in your day.
4. It’s greatly depressing to wear a beautiful gown only once and then stick it in storage (I still have a gorgeous Vera Wang gown from 2002 preserved in a box at my moms house if you’d like proof)**
5. Ok, there is one down side…no registry. Or gifts at all. Your family and friends may feel a bit slighted at not being invited so they will not run out and buy you toasters and plates. However, with all the money you saved on a wedding, you can buy them yourselves!
6. Better yet, you can use the money that would go to a party celebrating your marriage with things to start your marriage…like furniture!
7. All said and done, we spent about 6 stress free hours in the entire wedding process. Can I get a hallelujah? ***
8. Even with wedding planners, there were weekly meetings, countless emails, phone calls and pinterest board sharing. Owning a small business (doing what I love), I was annoyed at the amount of time all of this took. Adam hated it too. We ended up fighting after every single wedding planer meeting.
9. You avoid all family drama that comes up when a wedding is in sight.****
10. The bigger your families, the more feelings might be hurt by eloping…by at the same time, the bigger the wedding would have to be to include them all, so the bigger the savings of time, money and stress to be had.
Oh and one last thing…
Happy Anniversary Adam, it’s been an amazing year!!
*you can always have the party anyway after you elope. As soon as you stop calling it a wedding it becomes infinitely less stressful and cheaper.
**the cost to clean and preserve the gown was the same amount as the dress I eloped in (which I have now worn multiple times). I felt equally beautiful in both.
***the next day we went to ACL and I got to dance the night away to The Black Keys which in itself was EPIC and made for the most amazing post elopement celebration ever!!
****don’t even try to deny what a doozy that one could be!